I received a phone call from my sister early Thursday morning.  It was around 8:00 which I knew to mean one of two things: 1) there was a problem or 2) there was a really big problem.  As I’ve written before, my sister is getting married in 21 days.  Things have been coming together nicely so far, but as usually happens with all wedding planning, something eventually goes wrong.

I answered the phone as I tried to shake the sleep out of my voice, “Hey sweetie, how are you?”  

I could hear her despair as my sister said, “Okay.  I went to try on my wedding dress last night.”

Still not realizing there was a problem, I asked, ”Really, how did it look?  Do you like it?”

This time there was no disguising the panic I heard in my sister’s words, ”Well, let me just say that I tried on the dress in front of the seamstress, I smiled and said everything looked great, and then I went home and cried.”

Oh no.  This is worse than I thought.  My sister doesn’t panic easily and she certainly doesn’t cry over little details.  ”Okay, calm down, we’ll figure this out.  How bad is it?”

After a deep breath and a long sigh she said, “It looks like a bad prom dress from 1980.” 

There’s the sarcasm I know and love.  If she’s joking around, there’s still hope.  I mean surely it’s not that bad, right?  Before hanging up the phone, I promised that I would go with her that night to take a look at the dress.  Maybe it wasn’t that bad?  Maybe the light was hitting it at an odd angle and maybe it wasn’t really that shiny.  

Maybe I was wrong.  The dress was shiny and it did indeed look like a prom dress (although I would have said from 1985).  It’s not like the seamstress didn’t know what she was doing because she was obviously very talented.  There just seemed to be some disconnect between what my sister wanted and what was provided.  

I couldn’t help but thinking that she wouldn’t be in this mess if she didn’t have to have a dress custom made for her.  You see, my sister had one special requirement for her wedding dress that apparently no one on the east coast could accommodate: it had to have sleeves.  Well, that and she didn’t want it to cost a fortune, preferably under $1000.00.  That shouldn’t be too hard to find, right?  I mean sleeves are pretty common with clothes.  Just look around you, rarely do you see straps and halter tops at work or even at the mall.  So why is it that whenever we go shopping for a wedding gown or any other formal gown for that matter, spaghetti straps and halter tops are the only styles available?

Granted not everyone needs coverage due to religious reasons, I’ll give you that.  But how many girls/women do you know that actually look good in a strapless dress?  What if someone doesn’t want to show off their arms or their back or has problems “filling out” a bodice?  What are the options then?  

We had looked into these options when we first started shopping for her dress months ago.  We had gone to several bridal boutiques and each time we were told that we couldn’t be helped. No one carried dresses with sleeves as that is not what is in style.  Apparently the sexy look is in and the traditional look is out.  Of course I’m not saying you shouldn’t be able to wear a dress without sleeves if that’s what you want and a lot of the dresses are very beautiful.  I simply wish dress manufacturers offered women a choice.  

It’s not like we were asking for anything dramatic, just a simple cap sleeve would do.  But alas, our only option was a short bolero jacket to wear over the dress.  So we were forced to face facts, there was nothing for us to purchase.  We would have to have the dress custom made.  This normally wouldn’t be a huge problem except for the cost.  If you’re not worried about having sleeves, you can walk into David’s Bridal and buy a dress off the rack for $400.00.  A custom made gown, however, is going to cost you at least $1000, which is what my sister was trying to avoid.

Which brings us back to the current situation.  She had already spent $350 on fabric plus the cost of labor and we were no closer to having a dress.  And don’t forget that we are only three weeks away from the wedding.  We realized that we were out of luck.  All attempts to make this process painless and easy had been in vain.  The goal of having the dress ready weeks before the wedding was not to be achieved.  In other words, we were stuck.   

So what did we do, you ask?  We had no choice, we went to plan B.  After buying a dress that she liked from David’s Bridal, my sister took it to the seamstress who had made my wedding dress.  Thankfully, she is willing to help and will be able to alter the gown.  

And the total cost?  $1400.00.  

The good news is – she’ll have her sleeves.  And the best news – she will absolutely be the most beautiful bride ever.

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