The CPA had been looking forward to his Labor Day weekend motorcycle ride for weeks. He is getting ready to sell his bike so it was going to be his last hurrah and he wanted to do it right. He was planning an overnight trip down to Southern Virginia where he could just enjoy the countryside and being out on the road.
Now as much as I don’t like him riding his bike (back in my braver days I used to ride with him, believe it or not) I typically don’t say much and I definitely never tell him he can’t ride. He told me when we got married that he would not give up his bike as he had been riding since he was 15 years old. But this weekend was different somehow. I was really worried about him being gone for two full days and the thought of him being on the roads during a holiday weekend wasn’t helping.
I didn’t say much until the day before his trip when we had a long discussion before leaving for work. The discussion began with:
“What if something happened to you? What if you were in an accident and you were hours away and I couldn’t get to you?” and ended with, “I don’t want to raise this baby on my own.”
I know, a tad dramatic. But in my mind, the worst-case scenario always ended with me being the only parent to our child. I didn’t want to make him feel guilty, but underneath it all, I really didn’t want him to go.
Since there was no easy resolution and we were both a bit miffed, we put our discussion on hold and headed our separate ways. A couple of hours later, he gave me a call. This time, he began the discussion when he said:
“I can see where you’re coming from and you have a good point. I won’t ride the bike if you agree to go with me in the car and we make a little weekend getaway out of it.”
I knew he was disappointed. I knew he wanted to “feel the wind in his hair” and get out on the open road. I also knew that I wasn’t thrilled about spending hours touring the countryside. But I realized that he was sacrificing for me and our family. He was willing to give up his long-anticipated road trip in order to make me feel better. The least I could do was to sacrifice some of my weekend to join him.
We ended our conversation and I got back to work and as I did, I was filled with a sense of relief and gratitude. Whether I had been right or not, my husband was a big enough man to let me think I was. He acknowledged my concern, he admitted my point was a valid one, and he offered a compromise that would satisfy both of us.
That, my friends, is just one more reason why I love my husband.
What is one thing you love about your spouse/significant other?
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As in my personal board of directors – you know, your group of family and friends who see you through a crisis. Anyway, he is always there – always honest, sometimes brutally so but always comforting, reassuring and always there!
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