Today I am 38 weeks pregnant. 9 1/2 months, 266 days, 95.0% through. In other words, I could give birth at any moment now.
That’s really good to know considering I’m tired. Tired of getting up four times a night while I experience contractions and think “this is it!” (only to have the pains go away as soon as I get up) or four times to simply go to the bathroom and empty my always-full bladder.
I’m tired of my back constantly hurting, which forces me to hobble around in order to compensate for the extra weight pressing on my pelvis.
And I’m definitely tired of having no motivation whatsoever to do the things that I normally love to do such as read blogs (or write on mine, for that matter). No motivation to do anything but lie in bed and be as still as possible to keep my body from aching.
I’m physically exhausted, mentally anxious, and emotionally a mess, both willing and able to cry at the slightest provocation.
But as tired as I am, I wouldn’t give it up for anything. I know how fortunate I am to be here, just as I know how many women struggle to get to this point. I also know that this part will soon pass and I will be given a new role as a mother. I will soon be able to hold a little one in my arms and know that he is part of me and his father. Knowing this, I would willingly do it again in a heartbeat.
Of course that doesn’t keep me from counting the hours until he’s here because I’m just so tired. Well, that and the fact that I simply can’t wait to meet him.
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