The topic of conversation today is crying. Why? Because it seems that I hear a lot of it these days. There’s crying if a certain someone has to stop playing with his trains so we can get in the car. Then there’s crying when I insist on changing a diaper that is hanging to his knees from being so full. And, my personal favorite, the crying that takes place when he gets in trouble and has to spend a minute in time out.
I shouldn’t be surprised by all of the waterworks. I knew going into this that parenting would be hard and that it would have its challenging moments. But as a non-cryer, this constant shedding of tears has thrown me for a loop.
I realize that crying is just the symptom. Our two-year old is going through a lot of changes and I’m sure it’s frustrating. He’s adding new words to his vocabulary everyday, but he still struggles with getting his point across and I still struggle with understanding it. That’s got to be enough to drive anyone to tears. He’s also becoming more independent, which adds a certain level of contention to the mix. He wants his way and I want mine. He’s not yet to the point of being able to reason or to understand that actions have consequences, so trying to convince him that my way is the right way for now just doesn’t work.
All of this adds up to some serious wailing these days and it’s been enough for me to question not only my decisions but also my skills as a parent. But I keep pressing forward because that’s what parents do. And because everyone assures me that it’s just a phase and that it gets better. But the real reason I keep going is because of the small moments that remind me how much I love this little boy. Like yesterday morning when Henry lifted his head, looked up at me with those big blue eyes and his beautiful smile, and said, “Hi Mama.”
Yep, it’s worth it, every single minute of it. Even with the crying.
That said, if you have any words of advice, I’m all ears.